Tag Archives: goals

This Summer, Get Your Life Back Together

This summer is all about big and scary changes for me. What about you? What areas in your life — mental, financial, relationships with siblings or spouses, diet, etc. — need the most improvement? What makes you frustrated or unhappy is the area that needs the most work. Let summer 2013 be all about making healthy steps forward, not backward.

1. Mental Health 

Do you wish you had someone to talk to in confidence? Do you feel depressed, angry, hopeless or frustrated and not sure how to get out of this mess? Gather up your courage and locate a mental health professional. Focus on practical methods of therapy that will help you to focus immediately on the major issues and he or she will guide you to make the necessary changes in life.

  • Find a therapist at therapists.psychologytoday.com and enter your zip code.
  • Choose someone that specializes in areas you need work on (eg: anxiety or substance abuse, marriage counseling) and that accepts your insurance or offers a sliding fee scale — one of the most common reasons for putting off seeing a therapist is the thought that one cannot afford it — not true!
  • Make an appointment for next week.

2. Physical Health

Feel sluggish all the time, tired, and winded going up a few flights of stairs? Recently gained weight? Never exercise? It’s time to change.

  • Start small — 3 times a week for about 30 minutes.
  • Make it easy — take a walk after dinner. No purchases required to get fit.
  • Make it fun — involve your friends/family. Play tennis, play tag with kids, go to the beach and walk along the shore, go swimming, take Zumba, etc. Find something you like.
  • Make it last — attach the habit of exercising with something you already do everyday. Drive past a gym on the way home from work? Keep your gym clothes in your car and head there immediately before going home. Need to watch a certain show every night? Exercise during that program.

3. Spiritual Health

  • If you are religious and have been slacking on going to your church/temple/place of worship, it’s time to recommit. It’s a great place to feel a sense of community and faith like nowhere else and feel like you’re part of a bigger whole, which is comforting. Also, start reading your passages and reflecting silently, too. How can you be a better Christian/Jewish/Buddhist/etc. person today? Can you volunteer, help someone, read a new passage, pray, be closer to nature?
  • If not religious, you can still work on your spiritual health. Practice saying a mantra everyday that makes you feel empowered. Or go to a quiet place of nature and reflect silently.Take steps everyday to remain positive in your life and believe in the magick/karma/The Secret. Meditate. Do yoga. Feel more in tune with your body & soul. Align yourself — become more balanced.

4. Diet/Nutrition

  • This is an important step. Diet has a profound impact on the way we feel, think, and our ability to perform/function in our daily lives. Take this summer to practice eating habits that make you feel better. Journal what you eat, at what time, and how hungry you were. Note how it makes you feel after eating and what emotion you were feeling. Note trends in how you feel hours later or the next day, too — especially if you eat a lot of carbs (sluggish, tired, bloated). Change your habits one meal at a time and become more conscious of the calories you consume — though you don’t have to count them, it’s a good idea if you want to lose weight.
  • Eat cleaner, local, organic foods — search for local farmers markets in your area.
  • Eat more vegetables. Every meal. And try a new veggie once a week or so.
  • Drink water, not calories. An easy way to lose weight and feel better is to drink more water and replace sodas/juices/etc. with water.

5. Social Life/Happiness/Relationships

This is an important one to work on. Ask yourself honestly: How can you be a better…daughter, mother, son, father, wife, husband, friend, relative?

  • What relationships in your life are fading and need TLC? Who can you call that will brighten their face? Catch up with old friends.
  • Ditch the toxic people in your life, as well. If you feel negative when you’re around, make bad decisions like drink/smoke, or if they treat you badly, ditch them. Life is too short to hang around with awful friends. You can always make new friends that align with your goals. Seek them out.
  • Do something that makes you happy everyday. Even if it’s a little bit selfish. If you are not happy everyday, than what is the point of living — seek help if you are feeling depressed, and seek ways to bring happiness into your life on a constant basis.
  • Make an effort to be social, friendly, and confident — even if you don’t feel like it, fake it. It will get easier, I promise.

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If this article helped or inspired you in any way please let me know what you will be working on this summer. I have my own list and I’d like to see what you will be up to.

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4 Motivational Playlists for Working Out or Working Hard

There’s no question that amazing music lifts you up and transcends your thoughts and emotions into a new place. Here are my favorite 4 motivational playlists found for free on Youtube and for the tech-savvy, free to convert to mp3 for your iPod/listening device (like this one). Enjoy!

Get psyched!


or view on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NmVZT05ySfE
Good 30-40min mix of mostly rock tracks from the likes of rise against, breaking benjamin, and even eminem plus key movie soundtracks.


or view on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmfpHP5Upx8
one hour of dance tracks with powerful hits from avicii, david guetta, and more.


or view on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYZDKRQf4ZI
one hour of mixed electro/house hits.


or view on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZuH-TNeGYk
great opening speech “Pain is Temporary” by Eric Thomas followed by an hour of rock/rap mixes (such as: the game, 50 cent, hollywood undead, and body head bangerz)

have any favorites? Post the links in the comments! I love hearing new playlists for my work outs and for general GSD!

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3 Quick Life Hacker Tips: Sunday Edition

  • It’s important to be consistent in healthy and creative habits.
  • Remain positive even if you have to force yourself: adjust your attitude.
  • Put your goals in your view everyday, all the time — write them down, think about them, be a little bit obsessed — it’s how you become great.

check this out for great positive images on Pinterest.

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When Sh*t Happens, or When You’re Not Happy, Change Something

I’ve been having the most awful, cortisol-stuffed vein producing days lately. Sh*t keeps happening to me and I’m in a daze. Confusion settles around me like heavy cigarette smoke. It’s hard to feel like there’s ever a way out.

The important thing to know when you’re dealing with a day/week/month like this, is that you are never alone. There is someone who has been there, who has gotten through it, who is currently experiencing the same damn thing as you. Your situation is never 100% unique — there is always someone who has already walked in your path, overcome the sh*t and owned it.

Sometimes sh*t happens for a reason. Whether it was your fault or not, or whether you just had a stroke of awful luck and happenstance, it can bring along an unfortunate series of events. Most people will crumble. Give up. And they will never pick themselves off from being beaten down and throw themselves at whatever challenges them.

But the important thing to know is that you have the amazing ability to control the now. The present. F*ck the past, that’s spilled milk. Done. Over. Worst day of your life? Okay, but that was yesterday. It’s done, you can move on. 

Figure out what went wrong, find something you can learn from yesterday.

When sh*t happens, it’s easy to fall into an endless cycle of feeling sorry for yourself. 

Don’t. Stop right now.

The freedom that many have can be paralyzing to act — you CAN change the outcome. You CAN do something about it. It might be hard, or take a lot of courage, but there is always something you can do to make yourself happy when you’re not. 

The strategy is simple. But I didn’t say it wasn’t hard.

Not Happy? Change Something.

1. Figure out what makes you angry, upset, depressed, frustrated, and stressed.

2. Eliminate or get rid of these things. They are mentally, physically and spiritually destroying you slowly.

3. If the items in #1 require much planning, do that planning now. Need to quit your job that brings tears to your eyes every time you wake up in the morning? Establish a set of action plans to do this month, this week, and tomorrow.

4. Replace the negativity with healthier things that bring happiness. Especially if #1 items will take time to get rid of…paint, vent on the phone with a friend, go out to eat at your favorite restaurant, take a walk at the park, play with your kids or pet.

5. Establish the focus on your emotional state and stress levels, and do things to reduce it: get enough sleep. Eat vegetables and fruit. Drink plenty of water. Exercise. Meditate. Journal. Paint. See a life coach/counselor if you really need to, it truly helps. There is no stigma — help yourself.

Remember this: If you’re not working to make your life better, your life will not get better.

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3 Quick Tips I’ve Learned This Week

Sunrise
source

1. I’ve been working on my new site for the past week and it’s going swimmingly. Really I just dove in after thinking about a basic plan (basic keyword research, basic content plan, ideas for monetization and promotion). Once I saw a great keyword-optimized domain name, I decided to jump in and start. Is there something that you are waiting for the opportune moment, that perfect time to do it? Well, I’m here to let you know that there is none. Tip: stop waiting, and just do it. The worse that could happen is that you could succeed.

2. Sometimes the best motivation you can get is by talking with an older and wiser friend. Our conversation far exceeded normal conversation and felt more like a one on one therapy session with a success coach. I hung up my phone with a renewed sense of clarity and focus for my goals. Tip: who is able to help you, even if all they offer is their listening ears?

3. I’ve definitely been working long hours on my new website. It’s in a niche I’m excited in, and I wasn’t going to launch officially yet until I was completed with everything. But I said, Oh, what the hell (see tip #1) and started a double-prong attack of a)creating original content and b)building organic traffic. These take time, but when you do it right, you only have to do it once. I wouldn’t feel right having others write my articles or scraping unoriginal content from the internet (which oh hey, is also plagiarizing). Tip: if you’re going to do it at all, do it right. Don’t half-ass anything.

I’m excited about the future, but I also know that I can’t do it all. I’ve suspended my Fiverr gigs so I can focus on being on the other side of the internet marketing biz. I already have a list of 3-4 other niche ideas that I need to research the market on to find the exact micro niche possibilities that will prove to be profitable, and I have a huge learning curve ahead of me for getting traffic to my sites, but I love it all. Everything about it. Even “working for free” as I spend time writing my content and ebooks.

What brings you excitement this week? Make sure you spend time working on your goals everyday.

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11 Tips for How to Be Productive Right Now

keepcalmgsd

You may be mindlessly searching the internet, looking for ways to be productive, asking yourself, “what is something productive i can do right now?” You might have a huge list of things that need to be taken care of but you are overwhelmed, stressed, frustrated, and annoyed at your insane level of procrastination  But that will get you nowhere. You can read all the blogs on the internet about productivity and you won’t learn about how to be productive right now without actually GSD.

The hardest part of being productive is getting started. I love the acronym GSD because it’s a quick reminder to “Get Shit Done.” This is based off the popular and less vulgar term GTD which stands for “Getting Things Done”, a term from time management guru David Allen (and from the book of the same name).

The battle for focus is fierce, but you can GSD right now.

  1. GSD right in the morning. Wake up, get dressed and all that, and then go straight to work. Work first, play later.
  2. Do your worst, most dreaded task first. Get it done first, and it will feel like pushing a huge boulder down a mountain.
  3. Unless your work requires it, disable your internet connection and work offline.
  4. Or move entirely away from the computer.
  5. Blast your favorite music (epic movie soundtracks work great for monumental tasks) and GSD.
  6. Work for 5 minutes. Just five fucking minutes, dude. If you want, take a break after. But most likely you will have gotten the hardest part over with (starting) and will continue easily.
  7. I swear by Evernote — if you are distracted by a link, thought, image, video, etc. just copy and paste in an Evernote page and it saves instantly. Go back to it later.
  8. I make to-do lists on Evernote, too.
  9. Promise yourself something to look forward to (like watching that funny video) after you finish say an hour of that project. It’s good to take breaks. Just get back to work right after.
  10. Sometimes it’s easier to just work for the 2-3 hours full speed, no breaks. Then reward yourself with a sweet lunch or a smoke, whatever tips your hat. Think of this tip as “college finals” mode and you’ll get it.
  11. If you have a huge project ahead of you and you are distracting yourself from starting it because it’s so damn hard to start, spend time just chunking it down: take the boulder and turn it into rocks, and then pebbles. Then take that first step, that first pebble and start it.

What productive things did you just do, or are about to do after reading this article? Share any of your GSD tips!

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February, or the month of GSD

So January is almost over, and PROGRESS-WISE, that leaves me barely a stone’s throw away from where I started since 2012 ended.

I figure since February is such a short month (28 days!) that it’s time I mentally, physically, and metaphorically get shit done. Hence, Feb 2103 = Get Shit Done Month (GSD for short or if you don’t like swearing).

I’ve been lurking over at jessicamullen’s blog for a while to generally inspire myself and to think more positively about stuff. I’ve been trying to inject pieces of positiveness into the universe, take risks, and do things that terrify me, like participating in my classes. Just recently I took the plunge and gave myself a raise, technically speaking, on Fiverr: instead of getting 500 words for $5, I’m charging $5 for 250 words. And people are still ordering from me! My fears have been abated. I deserve more. I write good (er..well). People like my work. I’ve been committing to going to classes like it’s my job. I like learning when I’m there. I like my teachers. I like feeling productive, instead when I skip I feel useless and generally crappy.

the only thing that I’m not working on at all is my weight situation, which is, er, a huge problem. I’m tired of gaining and not losing. I want to be healthy, happy in my own skin. But I’m not acting like I want to be those things. I’m behaving like I want to be unhappy, unhealthy, and uncomfortable. I have to reverse this horrible habit. So this month I’m mostly going to concentrate on going to the on-campus gym (which is right there and, free) after classes at least three days per week for 30 minutes to start. The weather is a tad less wintry and awful, so I’ve been walking to school some days, which takes 15 minutes one direction. I will end up not taking my car completely when it is consistently warmer out.

I’ve been adding healthier things in my diet, but I also eat a lot of nonhealthy things, and just plain unfood. Cookies, chips, and other things I inhale to distract myself from other things just has to stop. It’s time for lettuce. tomatoes. broccoli. Things that make me feel better after eating, not worse. not things that make me sick. figuratively and literally.

I also need to make my DAYS more productive. How do business people act? People who freelance professionally? People who have the lifestyle I want? I need to emulate that. People who create multiple streams of income online do not sleep until 2pm. People who freelance professionally do not stay up until 3am eating cookies (I think).

These people wake up early, at a set time everyday, exercise first thing in the morning, eat a real breakfast, get their work done early and don’t bullshit on the internet half the time, and keep their house clean and orderly. They manage their time well and don’t have to rush for deadlines, well unless they like the rush (don’t all writers? we like punishing ourselves this way, don’t we). They know how to get into FLOW and FOCUS. They take breaks and eat regular, balanced meals. They still have plenty of time for other creative and social activities. They know what to do to avoid getting depressed or feeling hopeless.

This February, I will GSD. Will you take the challenge with me?

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The “Better Life” Epic Brainstorm List

My previous post has me thinking about how I want to be looking back at my life 5 years from NOW. I want to be leaps and bounds away from where I’m at currently, in multiple areas of my life, physically and mentally.

So here’s how I’m going to do that: epic brainstorming sesh.

I’m going to uninhibitedly thing of anything and everything that I want my life 5 years from now to consist of, include, become, do, have, and think. because in order to change, you must first write it down. so do it with me.

i will be 100-120 pounds thinner. i will eat a low-carb paleo-inspired diet rich in greens, healthy proteins, and whole foods. i will regularly engage in exercise, and become someone who likes running. i will participate in 5Ks regularly for the fun of it, especially the Color Me Rad event. my brain won’t be foggy and it will be easy to concentrate and focus. my mind won’t wander; mostly, because i will be eating the right foods and giving my body vitamins and nutrients. i will drink plenty of water, and almost never soda. i will learn to love coffee with either  splenda, truvia, or drink it black. i will drink tea mostly, unsweetened, if i desire a caffeine boost. i will have protein shakes for breakfast and make delicious smoothies. i will walk to places that are close by. i will play tennis at the park. i will go hiking for fun, and explore nature around me. i will take a jog by the beach at sunrise. i will take hard boot camp classes and kickboxing and feel healthy and strong like a woman should.

i will have an office space in my next apartment that is solely for me; with inspiring notes, pictures, and words of wisdom. i will have a bookshelf or kindle with the best books on it and read my favorites and discover new authors that i love. i will make a good amount of money writing; i will have increased my rates to one i feel comfortable working for, and my clients love my work. i get new exciting projects all the time and more people recognize my work online. i will have finished a novel and will mostly self-publish online as an ebook. i will be working on other novels and projects all the time; always many projects half-finished. but i am a productive worker, i get things done when i need to and i don’t have a hard time concentrating or focusing. i make enough money online through freelancing and website projects that i do not have to have a job, but i do anyway because i like working. i have enough money saved for an entire year of emergency income, and i am never late on bill payments. my husband and i have a one-bedroom in a southern state because i hate the snow, and he is going to grad school. our love life is amazing and we go stronger and closer everyday. i have a good circle of friends and i talk to out of state friends regularly online. i am networking with other bloggers and freelancers.  i am taking online web design classes and paying off student loans from my bachelor’s degree. my part time job utilizes my love of psych to help children, adolescents, or mentally disabled kids in some way. i am thinking of going to grad school for a teaching degree before we start a family. i am contacting agents to realize an important dream of mine, to become an offline published author, with a real physical book with my name on it.

just writing this out makes it sound a little more do-able. i am excited for my future, for tomorrow, next week, and to see how the next five years will pan out for me.

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Who I Was 5 Years Ago, Plus LinkLove

coolthingnotext

I am a super self-improvement nerd, reader and collector of all things self-help, psychological, inspirational, motivational, and ass-kicking.  =) So I think it’s about time I compile what I’ve been reading on the interwebz as of late.

Lately when I find it difficult to concentrate, or if I am feeling like I cannot accomplish my goals, I turn to any of these links and I am met with sparkling inspirational abundance. Each of the people behind these links transcends my goal-setting into overdrive as I can only wish that someday I can be a fraction as inspiring and awesome as they are…

These have become part of a massive list of great blogs I have on my Evernote.

Jessica Mullen ESPECIALLY School of Life Design
Get Rich Slowly
I Will Teach You To Be Rich
Lifehacker
Pick the Brain
Zen Habits
As always, Steve Pavlina but ESPECIALLY this, this,, and this

And my good friend allyssa‘s new blog just oozes amazingness. She inspired me to write about this:

Me, 5 Years Ago…Vs. Today

Five years ago, in 2008,  I was 19 years old. I was a second-semester freshman at Southern CT State University. I had just graduated high school, and I was excited to be going to college. I didn’t get a room so I was using multiple modes of transportation to get to school. It was exhausting, and I was also working part-time at a local drive-in (fast food joint). My major was Psychology. I had been going out with my boyfriend for 3 years now. Gosh, it’s hard to think so far back in time. It feels like forever ago. I barely remember my classes taken at SCSU. I was drinking pretty regularly and just experiencing going to night clubs, but it was hard to make friends at the college since I was only there for classes. I weighed a lot less than I do now, mostly due to walking everywhere, and I still lived at home. I mostly went to Burt’s house to see him, though.

My parents got divorced, and in 2009, my mom remarried and got pregnant. She kicked me out of the house and I had nowhere to go, but Burt’s family let me live with him. I was stressed and poor and I ended up dropping out of SCSU to avoid failing all of my classes that I never went to. I never, ever thought I would do this. Little did I know that I would transfer colleges twice (attending 3 institutions), and drop out of college twice…

I began to gain weight since I didn’t care, and we always ate out. Soon I was extremely overweight. I was working a lot but I felt like something was missing. I decided to attend community college, which was in the same city I lived, so commuting was easier. I also managed to afford another car, so it made driving easier. I also got another job. I got my Associate’s in 2010, and felt pretty good, besides my weight.

Which brings me to where I am today, in the cusp of 2013. I am now 23, turning 24 in June, and happily married to the boyfriend I’ve loved since 2005. I have went from unhappily attending SCSU, dropping out, transferring to community college, receiving my AS in General Studies, and transferring to CCSU, another state university. We moved to our first apartment, and out of a destructive environment. Probably due to the depression that keeps coming back, I became unhappy at CCSU and didn’t see the point in anything. Actually I  almost dropped out of CCSU, but I took a leave of absence instead (with the coaxing of the registrar guy) to withdraw from last semester and am now happily enrolled full time this semester. My GPA took a huge hit due to failing classes and bad attendance, but I’m determined to finish my Bachelor’s Degree. I’ll be the first in my family to get one.

so what has changed in five years? Sometimes I still feel like the lost teenager, crippled with depression and anxiety that makes it nearly impossible to go to class. My weight and health is poor, and I’ve quit cigarettes 5 times (going on 3 months right now cig-free again). My weight is at an all-time high, but I’m actively making changes to lose weight again.

I’ve definitely matured in five years, though in the midst of depression I don’t feel like I have. I feel like I am less depressed but my anxiety is much worse. I am trying to solve this without the need for pills. I still feel like a lot of things would be easier when I lose weight.

I still feel like I have a lot of things to work on in my life. My mind changes constantly, and I love trying new things. But I still love reading and writing. In November I reached 35,000 words in my NaNoWriMo novel, and I’m determined to finish it. I truly want to be a writer.

And that is pretty much the only thing I’ve figured out, even though I knew it all along. But now I have clearer paths to become that writer I’ve always wanted. I’m making money with it online, and I write for fun in this blog of mine and offline, as well as working on the novel. I also occasionally write poetry, but that was more my thing during the depressed years.

So my epic goal for 2013 and beyond? I will become a writer, and I will define personally what that means for me in terms of success.

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Brainstorm Your 2013 Goals Before the Ball Drops

ResolutionsSo, the end of the year holidays are upon us, and I am left laying in bed or day-dreaming in my commute to work about next year. The year 2013, where we will all gain another year under our belt and hopefully work on our goals. Have you given any thought about the new year? If not, it’s time to start, before you’re left in January 1, 2013 wondering how to make your life not suck.

  • Start small. Most people fail at new year’s resolutions because they dream too big, and have unrealistic expectations of what can be accomplished in a year. Yes, you must challenge yourself out of the status quo — but do not start out too big or you will just stare out the window, too overwhelmed to begin. Think of your overall goal and pick one aspect, that is workable in your life for one year, and start there.
  • Write in the present. A great trick to shifting your attitude that YES, you CAN do this, is to write your goal as if you are already doing that thing. For example, don’t say, “I want to lose weight next year.” Instead, say, “I am 50 pounds thinner and I feel healthy and more able to do things I love with my children.” Reading the first sentence feels scary, because not only is it an undefined goal (how much weight? what is the deadline? why do you want to do this?, etc), but it doesn’t feel attainable at the moment. When you read the second sentence, you actually feel happy imagining your life through that sentence and can begin shifting your attitude to realizing that very goal. More important, the second sentence tells you non-physical reasons to lose that weight, to be healthier and to play with your children. You feel that motivation stirring you because you have identified WHY you want this goal.
  • Once you figure out the WHAT and the WHY, you can begin chunking your goal into smaller and smaller pieces. These will become action steps for you to work on in regular intervals from monthly tasks, to weekly tasks — as small as what you can do TOMORROW for your goal.
  • Don’t make resolutions. No one sticks to those past Valentine’s Day. Consider these contracts or promises to yourself that you must keep.
  • Find someone to keep you accountable. It can be anyone, even an online buddy from a forum. I love subreddits to find great support and to find lots of information about basically anything.
  • Reflect and re-evaluate every week. Not so good this week? Figure out now what you need to to and change, even if it’s just one thing you focus on each week. Soon, you will see yourself gradually making progress.
  • Accept that you’re going to slip up, fall off the wagon, or lose track altogether. The important part is when you realize it and get yourself back on track. That’s why you re-evaluate, weekly.
  • Be thankful for what you have, everyday. Being thankful for things changes your attitude from negative to positive, and makes you take a look at all the luxuries you possess. I’ll take a wild guess and assume you have: a place to live, a bed to sleep on, heat and/or ac or fan, food and a fridge, a stove to cook food, shoes, a coat, maybe a job, maybe a family, a cell phone, internet connection and computer, money to buy things you like, a car. You’d be amazed at how many people in this world do not even have clean water, let alone any of this stuff.
  • Spend time each week reading something that is somehow related to your goals or inspirational in some way. You do not have to purchase books, support your local library.
  • There’s an app for that. If you have a smartphone, I bet there is an app that can help you keep track of your goals. Try Mint for money-tracking, and My Fitness Pal app for calorie/meal and exercise tracking.

Here is a brief, work-in-progress list of my goals for 2013. Maybe we share the same goals?

  • Lose 50 pounds by June 4, my birthday, which is a teeny bit over 2 pounds per week: I will be 50 pounds lighter and will have established a healthy eating and exercise routine for lasting health. Figure out by January 5 my method of exercise (gym or home? walk around block etc). I will reward myself by buying a new outfit (jeans, shirt, shoes).
  • Promote self as freelance writer on Fiverr and Freelancer and find long-term work to provide me with enough money for rent each month: I will earn enough money for rent each month with my freelance writing.
  • Save at least 10% of all paychecks in savings account not to be touched.
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